The Blacklist

I've become bitter in my not-so-old age.

~Lynx

Some of you will notice the deletion that occurred on our MySpace.. While others are too busy with their fucking heads up their ignorant asses to realize they've been included.

I find it very sickening.

When we started the MySpace, I had, for a fleeting moment, the idea that maybe, just maybe some decent people would be met. I was wrong. Not only was I wrong, but not even indecent people were met.. As if so, you'd see them listed here.

I'm disappointed in the lot of you. And frankly, if it were entirely up to me, the vast majority of you would be thrown to the wayside and replaced with willing participants. Not boring, horny, one-track-minded men, who clearly only come to MySpace for a little T&A (I know, a shock!), which you obviously didn't get.

This saddens me deeply. Why? Because you're simply reinforcing my current belief that men totally suck. Can't trust 'em, can't love 'em, can't count on 'em.. Actually, they're fucking useless.

I'd be a lesbian if I liked women any better.

So there. That's what I have to say.

"Fuck you", doesn't even begin to cover it.

All My Love,
Lynx

We are currently looking for a third, fourth, fifth (there's no limit really) member of our blog.

There are a few rules, but don't worry, they're nothing you can't handle because I don't take kindly to rules and I handle them fine...

Oh wait. I helped write them! Hahahaaaa!

Anyway, here goes:

1. Thou Shalt Remain Incognito. This means that while you must tell us who you are (simply because we have to add you to the ranks), you are not to tell anyone else. Not your mother, your father, your friends, your siblings, maybe not even your dog.. But I may consider your dog as able to keep a secret, because I know how loyal they are. Nobody is to know. This means you are to come up with a unique name that is not correlated with one you're using anywhere else.
The reasons behind this are simple - you are thoroughly encouraged to say whatever you want on the blog. You'll note the subtitle is "Where Foul Language, Brutal Honesty, and Carrying Everything to the Extreme is ALL We do". This is the truth to the greatest extent. And your identity is safe with us.

2. Thou Shalt Not Be Revolting. This simply means that we will not allow (in contradiction to #1's "whatever you want") any posts with any hint of suggestion to things such as: Child Abuse, Animal Abuse, Rape, Pedophilia, or Bestiality. These are obviously disgusting. At the moment there is nothing else I can think of to add to this list - but we reserve the right to edit this list anytime we see necessary. I don't foresee much placed on this list as we value our right to freedom of speech, regardless of whom it may offend.

3. MySpace. You are not required to have a MySpace profile to go along with your blog identity, but you are not to use your current one either for purposes related to the blog. The choice is yours whether or not to make another.

That's it!



More may be added, but I doubt it. We just reserve the right to do so.


Don't respond to this blog entry, as logic would have it that doing so would blow your anonymity. Email us at

dear.blacklist.babes@gmail.com

OR - you can message me through my MySpace profile.

We look forward to hearing from you soon!

Impatiently,
Lynx

It's a foul fucking day. I need something to bitch about, but I have nothing yet...

Tread Lightly,
Lynx

We are.. And judging from the responses to our disappearances, so are you. What's the fucking hold up people?

We know why we've been M.I.A., but for you, there's just no excuse.

Sincerely Spiteful,
Lynx

If your man calls you insecure, ask him what he's doing wrong then.

Love,
Lynx

This is an old picture, but I just now saw it. It came from this site with this article:



Feb 26, 2007

Retired model-turned-talk show host Tyra Banks stunned fans during a recent taping of her hit daytime show by asking to grope American Idol star Katharine McPhee's breasts.

The two ladies were chatting about plastic surgery when probing Banks asked the singer if reports about her getting breasts implants were true.

McPhee insisted her boobs are all natural, and when Banks asked, "Can I touch them?" the Idol star let her.

And the touch test proved conclusive for Banks. She yelped, "They're real."

I don't follow any of this shit, but this picture of Tyra Banks (34) and Katherine McPhee (23) absolutely cracks me up.

That is all,

Lynx

What state and what city doesn't matter you nosy stalking fuckers, you know they're the same everywhere. I just called them. It's all automated.

To hear this menu in English press one. To hea...

One.

Please press one to file your claim. Press two if you were told to call this number to file your claim. Press three if you filed your claim and were told to call this number. Press four if you were told to call this number after you filed a late claim. Press star to repeat this menu.

Four.

Please hold for the next available representative.

A pause.

You are the one thousand four hundred and sixty second person on hold. To prevent you from waiting longer than necessary, we suggest you use our website to file your claim or try your call again later. This call will now disconnect.

A click.

I look at my cell phone, dumbfounded. The automated service hung up on me. Bastards. I hit redial. Four times. Four repeats of this bullshit. Whaddya know, five is my lucky number!

Please hold for the next available representative.

A pause.

Elevator music. A nasty polka and disco hybrid.

Minutes pass.

More minutes. Ten. Fifteen. Oh no, I've reached dolka stage, I dare not hang up now.

Your call is very important to us. To limit your time on hold, please select one of the following options. If you're unemployed because you love dealing with this automated service, press one. If you're unemployed because you're a lazy welfare recipient, press two. If you're on hold because you really have this little of a life, press three. If you're waiting to speak to a representative for the next 45 minutes, press four.

Four.

Four.

Four.

Four.

FOUR.

FOUR!

FOURFOURFOURFOUR!!!

Elevator music.

Jesus!

Minutes pass. More minutes. Ah fuck it. I’ll cut this long, boring, ridiculous story short. She answers.

This is __________(fill in any foreign sounding name here.) *Unintelligible language* How may I help you?

I tell her who I am, and what I'm calling for as I couldn't care less who she is or whatever else she said. All that matters to me at this point and every other point is what she can do for me.

She puts me on hold. Only she doesn’t. I sit here listening to her breathe. She questions me about every little detail regarding my claim, from why I’m filing so late to why I hadn’t been filing all this time. She asks me about school, telling me she’ll resend me a school form that needs to be filled out, that I already filled out. I start to get a bit agitated here. I’m pretty sure she didn’t even realize it. She puts me on non-hold hold again. Her breathing quickens. She’s either about to have an orgasm or a revelation. She speaks.

These checks will be reissued.

This is the bottom line of the story, you know. But now I’ll tell you, I’ve had to repeat everything this woman has said to me back to her to ensure I’ve gotten it correct. This is an unemployment office in the STATES. The United States, by God. Here, we speak English as a first language. I’m pretty sure English wasn’t even this woman’s second language. Or third. I haven’t even a clue what nationality she was. That’s how far from my language she spoke.

This happens all the time anymore, and I now realize why some of us have trouble finding jobs. Well, those of us that are actually looking anyway. Because they’re all taken by non-English speaking foreigners. I almost demanded she give the phone to someone who speaks English as a fourth language. They'd have to be more comprehensible.

Before you start all the snippy shit about my opinion on the lack of jobs in our country, my hatred of automated telephone services, my dislike for trying to deal with English-butchering foreigners, or the fact that I’m unemployed, save it. That’s my advice to you. Save it. I was busting my ass to support welfare recipients and the rest of the vagrants that litter our streets. Little homeless fuckers, begging for change to buy their booze, crack cocaine, and porn. Parading about our streets in their filthy, dumpster looted clothing with 'Will Work for Food' signs. I’d actually buy one of them a cheeseburger to clean my house if I knew I wouldn’t get robbed blind.

Gotta keep my porn stash safe.

But that’s another tirade, for another time.

Most Sincerely,
Lynx

Her screen name is Lady Lynx, but you can call her Lynx. It’s shorter, and easier for simple minds to remember.

Lynx is part of the duo that started this blog, but maybe her reasons differ as to why. Lynx hopes to share her accumulated wisdom with the rest of the world. Here, you’ll find her brutally honest opinions on anything and everything you can imagine. In fact, if you have a topic you’d like to hear from her about, feel free to contact her at the.lady.lynx@gmail.com.

Some bits about her
She believes in loving one another and giving back to the community. She volunteers frequently at homeless shelters and feeds stray children. Ginger kids are her favorite. She loves Jesus and America too. She’s a good girl, crazy about Elvis. She loves horses and her boyfriend too.

Now I'm free... Freee Faaallllin..

That was really rough to write. If you really believe any of that B.S., I'm not your type of chick. Sorry.

Moving on.

She does love horses though, and other animals. She loves fuzzy toesocks, fingerless gloves, gothic clothing, purple ink, and classical music in the shower. She’s a fluffy girly-girl with flowery mats in her car.

She sleeps with the television on and has a black bed canopy. She’s an atheist. Her hobbies include cemetery art, photography, go-go dancing, and building things out of pop tabs. Her favorite colors are green and black, but she wears and decorates in hot pink. She loves drama and horror movies but hates westerns and science fiction. Her lifelong dream is to be Ruler of the World. Just wait.

Lynx is abrasive and cruel. She’s opinionated and rude and never censors her words. She always says “The best part of being me is that I’m not you". She’s a realist.

She hates stupidity; it runs rampant. She also cannot stand children, telemarketers, liars, cowards, and people who are mean to animals. Organized religion, mushrooms, unbathed people, dirty fingernails, and insects disgust her. She believes the Death Penalty is underused and Abortion overrated. She is an extremist.

She doesn’t care if she’s liked. She has enough friends and if ever she decides she wants any more, she knows where to look. Don’t stalk her, she’ll stalk you. She has an antisocial personality. On purpose.

Most likely you’re not going to approve or like anything she thinks, which she’ll be saying freely here.

You’ll read anyway.

You’ll have to.

It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance. May the onslaught begin.

Cordially,
Lynx